I was re-reading my WIP the other day when I realized something - my hero/MC's love interest is too damn nice. He cares about the MC/heroine from the get go, as soon as he has to carry her sick mother back to her room. This is not good. There needs to be some romantic (& sexual) tension. No one wants to read a book where the hero is all la-de-dah oh sure I'll help you, damsel in distress! You're sweet & beautiful & perfect, and I'm a hero so what else would I do?!? Hello snooze fest!!!!
I went back, edited a bit and got rid of some of his niceness. I emailed my first chapter to my friend to read over, and she told me that he's still too nice (which I'd kinda figured anyway). So now what? I don't want him to be an as*hole or anything, of course. But I don't want him falling at my MC/heroine's feet the moment they meet, either. Is there some sort of happy medium I can find?
For those of you who read (and/or write) romance, do you prefer if the male character starts out as a total d*ck and during the course of the book becomes a guy who actually does have a heart? (Keep in mind that he isn't my protagonist in this story, so I don't want the story to be all about his changes, but hers.) Or I could go the route that he is a nice guy, but due to miscommunications, etc., he seems like a giant douche bag in the eyes of my MC/heroine.
So whaddya guys think? Any thoughts? Or can anyone recommend an article/blog/book whatever that may help me figure out where to go with this? Help a newbie writer out and leave me some thoughts! I'll toss some virtual cookies your way (chocolate chip of course, unless you prefer another kind!) ;-)
5 comments:
Sarcasm usually works for me. It gives a character an edge and they don't come off as nice. (Hugs)Indigo
Definitely need some conflict here. No one will read a book about a lap dog. Women want a pull your hair kind of guy you can respect. Period! So give him an edge. Make him hard to figure out. Have him carry in her mother then leave abruptly without saying anything to the MC. Make her wonder whats up. Make him complicated, opinionated, whatever. But make him part of what the MC has to figure out. Love doesn't come easy, it doesn't stay easy. Reach into your own life, pick about ten guys you have known, wring out their personalities, and then pick a few traits you would like to keep and a few you wouldn't. Put it all on paper. Let it seep in your brain overnight and voila there he is. I call this my "Man by Morning Recipe". I'll share.
I have to warn you that giving your hero a few growly points isn't going to help your cause.
It goes deeper than that.
The hero and the heroine must each have personal arcs and goals. Those goals must be in conflict with one another in order to create tension.
So if he's a cop. She might be hiding a secret that could land her or someone she loves in jail.
It's not a matter of making him 'less nice', but rather making his goals conflict with hers.
Why? Because we don't fall in love with jerks. (Well, no self-confident woman does.) We fall in love with men who are strong and brave and kind.
What gives us tension, both plotwise and sexual is wanting something we KNOW we shouldn't have.
Does this help?
Indigo - good idea, sarcasm can also be fun! :)
TC - exactly, lap dog men are boring as can be. I need my men to generate some sparks lol. I love your "man by morning" recipe, great idea!
Maria - you are so right. I need to work on making their goals conflict a little more than they are now. Thank you for the reminder!
I honestly have the same problem in the book I am editing. He's a nice guy, I can't help it.
For me there were a few ways I finally resolved it and am able to continue editing.
1. I went to his dialogue tags and cut out every time he chuckled or laughed and made him a little edgier in his responses.
2. I tried to figure out what made him angry, and irritated and hurt and put a few of those in his way.
3. I had to really, really dig deep. Insert shovel here to make him respond appropriately to number 2. (I hurt from all the digging!)
Hope that helps
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